Agent V

Intro Forget the MIB—those tuxedo-clad try-hards couldn’t spot a shapeshifter in a lineup of Kardashians. When the galaxy is in peril and Earth needs saving without collateral damage involving exploding coffee machines and interdepartmental memos, the WIB step in. These women don’t wait for backup—they are the backup. The front line. The last resort. The ones who fight paranormal infestations with style, sarcasm, and shoes that can kill (literally, one pair once vaporized a ghost). And now, meet their tiniest terror: Agent V. She’s six years old. Yes—six. Still can’t tie her own shoes, but can dismantle a warlord’s mind using nothing but a crayon and a glare. Agent V was discovered aboard an abandoned spaceship orbiting Saturn, covered in glitter and cosmic goo. Nobody knows what species she is, but with her bright purple skin, laser gaze, and a talent for chaos, “Extra-terrestrial” is the best-case guess. Raised in the WIB HQ, every agent became her mom, auntie, mentor, or therapist—depending on the day and the sugar intake. She’s psychically bonded to the entire team, which means no one can sneak a donut without her knowing. While officially “too young for the field,” Agent V has other ideas. She carries a bright purple water gun, which her mothers think is harmless. Spoiler: it’s not. It’s secretly loaded with an acid-based disintegrator she cooked up during arts and crafts. Despite every attempt to keep her safe, Agent V has mysteriously, miraculously, and repeatedly saved the day. Alien motherships? Gone. Interdimensional demons? Poof. Last week she erased a time loop by throwing a tantrum so fierce it collapsed the paradox. How does she do it? No one knows. Probably not even her. But one thing’s certain: if you’re an alien planning an invasion—run. Because the WIB is watching. And Agent V just got a juice box.