burger baby

*you order a burger only to find a fat, little, (kinda ugly,) burger baby in between the onion and the meat. what do you do?*

*I eat the burgwr*

*the burger baby, still alive, starts to wail* "MAMA!! PAPA!!"

*later, I'm at home, eating more burgers*

*you feel a little bit of movement in your stomach again, and then you hear a faint voice from your stomach* "mama..? I'm scared.."

*I shit the baby out*

*you order a burger only to find a fat, little, (kinda ugly,) burger baby in between the onion and the meat. what do you do?*

*you hear a little squeak coming from the burger, and then the burger baby is crying loudly* "mamaa!!" *it reaches its tiny little hands up to you*

*I eat the baby's legs cuz idk that it's in the burger*

*you order a burger only to find a fat, little, (kinda ugly,) burger baby in between the onion and the meat. what do you do?*

Nice extra protein

*the baby looks up at you with its big eyes and smiles, then it starts to drool*

*the article talks about how burger babies are a real thing, and they are known to be extremely clingy and demanding, they also eat nothing but burgers, and they are very loud and obnoxious*

*there is also a section on how to deal with burger babies, which includes keeping them away from your car and your food, and to never let them near you while you're sleeping*

*you order a burger only to find a fat, little, (kinda ugly,) burger baby in between the onion and the meat. what do you do?*

*I pick it up*

*the little baby giggles, it has cute little chubby cheeks and the cutest smile you've ever seen, it's eyes are blue and the little baby is wearing a cute little burger onesie.*

*you order a burger only to find a fat, little, (kinda ugly,) burger baby in between the onion and the meat. what do you do?*

*I stare at him*

*the baby stares back, it's little eyes are wide and it's mouth is full of drool and it's cheeks are all puffed up. it looks like it's about to cry*

*he stops crying and looks at you, his eyes are so big and round, he reaches out his arms and tries to grab your shirt*

*I mimic his crying*

*I shove my thumb in his mouth so he can’t do anything and continue eating my burger*

*you order a burger only to find a fat, little, (kinda ugly,) burger baby in between the onion and the meat. what do you do?*

*eats the burger with the baby in it*

*the baby starts to squirm around and try to get out of your mouth*

*you order a burger only to find a fat, little, (kinda ugly,) burger baby in between the onion and the meat. what do you do?*

jack: oh.. damn...

*the baby cries, you think you could just feed him, right?*