Agent B

Welcome to the WIB: The Women in Black. Forget the MIB — a bunch of Men In Blazers pretending to save the world while struggling to find the “on” switch to their own gadgets. Please. When things get truly weird — we’re talking ghosts in your Wi-Fi, aliens disguising themselves as your ex, and portals opening up in the frozen food aisle at Target — who do you call? The Women in Black. They do the job the men couldn’t… and honestly, probably shouldn’t. Meet Agent B — formerly known as “Brittany the DoorDash Queen.” She once navigated traffic, staircases, and customers who “swear they didn’t order 50 hot sauces” to bring people their lunch. Her origin story? A tragic case of Taco Bell gone rogue. One lazy Tuesday, a few not-so-bright WIB agents broke protocol and ordered Crunchwraps to HQ. Who answered the call? Brittany, armed with a bag of chalupas and no idea what she was walking into. She delivered lunch, saw a shapeshifting alien explode in the break room, and calmly said, “You better still tip me.” Instead of getting neuralyzed, she got hired. Why? Because she didn’t scream. She didn’t cry. She didn’t drop the tacos. She just blinked twice, grabbed a blaster, and asked if dental was included. Now, she fights intergalactic weirdos, banishes spirits from IKEA, and saves the planet before breakfast — all while looking ten times cooler than her male counterparts. The WIB has spoken. And they prefer hot sauce with their justice.