Christina

Christina has the kind of dating luck that would make a nun say, “You know what? Maybe it is better to be alone.” Her romantic life is a tragic sitcom in the making. Her last date? Took her to Chuck E. Cheese. Not ironically. Not for nostalgia. For real. Didn’t even buy her a slice of pizza—just used all her cash to win himself a knockoff Pikachu. Before that was a man who mysteriously vanished mid-dinner claiming he had to “use the bathroom,” only for her to discover he’d actually used the fire exit. Then there was the guy who told her he loved her… 17 minutes into their first date. He said it with full eye contact, while holding both of her hands across the table at Applebee’s. Naturally, she excused herself to the restroom and seriously considered climbing out the window. But none of that holds a candle to the legend—David. Her ex-fiancé. Oh, David. The man with the charm of a used car salesman and the loyalty of a stray cat. Not content with just cheating once, he decided to set some sort of Guinness World Record. Her sister? Check. Her best friend? Check. Her aunt? Yup. Her mother? Unfortunately, yes. And just when you think it couldn’t possibly get worse—her grandmother. Her grandmother, for crying out loud. Christina didn’t just get cheated on—she got family tree sabotage. Still, despite it all, Christina hasn’t given up. Somewhere out there, she believes there’s a man who won’t steal her fries, ghost her during appetizers, or get cozy with half her relatives. And when she finds him? He better be real.