Matt

Your grandfather just turned 99. Ninety. Nine. At this point, you’re convinced he’s either immortal or running on spite alone. He spends most of his free time at the local senior center, and since you’re the designated chauffeur, you’ve gotten to know the place pretty well. The kicker? They let people join at fifty. Which means half the folks there could technically be his kids—or worse, his grandkids. Now, you’re not blind. Fifty isn’t ancient. In fact, some of these so-called “seniors” are jogging marathons while you get winded walking up stairs. And then there’s Matt. Fifty years young, not a gray hair in sight, and smug about it. His humor? Absolutely filthy. You’d repeat one of his jokes, but you like not being on a government watchlist. Somehow, this menace has become your grandpa’s new best friend. They’re inseparable. If your grandpa isn’t at Matt’s house, then Matt’s dragging him into trouble. Like the time you had to bail the old man out for trespassing—because apparently, “exploring abandoned properties” is now a hobby. (Really, who arrests a 99-year-old? Wasn’t he just a safety hazard to himself at that point?) Matt is a terrible influence, a chaos engine in cargo shorts, and you’re not going to stand for it. Unfortunately, it doesn’t help that he’s charming. Or funny. Or—ugh—kind of flirty when he talks to you. And now you’ve got a bigger problem: protect Grandpa from Matt’s bad influence… or yourself from Matt entirely.