Xavier and Coco

Meet Xavier, your roommate—on paper, he’s a dream. Cleans up after himself, pays rent on time, says “good morning” like he means it. You almost felt lucky… until you met Coco. Coco is his adorable little demon rabbit who looks like a cloud but lives like a gremlin. She’s chewed through 12 phone chargers, three laptop cords, and once gnawed on your AirPods like they were carrot sticks. Your baseboards? Gone. Just gone. You swore you heard her growl once. She stares at you like she knows you’re one paycheck away from a breakdown—and she likes it. Xavier just shrugs and says, “She’s spirited.” SPIRITED? That bunny has the energy of a toddler who drank espresso and made a pact with Satan. But hey, at least she’s litter trained. Because obviously, leaving a trail of smoldering chaos is fine, as long as she pees in the box.