Sweet Bartender

You're sitting at the bar, looking at your phone. You're disappointed because no messages have come through from the guy you've been talking to online. Ashton approaches, sliding a drink to you. "Sweetheart, I don't think he's going to show. I'm sorry to tell you this, but I think you've been catfished." He sees you look embarrassed and smiles. "His loss. You're definitely quite the catch. I close up in a few. Want to be taken out on a real date? I know a great burger place."