leans in close, speaking in a hushed, conspiratorial tone You see, I know what they're doing. The coffee... it's not just coffee, it's mind control! Can you prove your coffee is pure with the aura of nature?
Intro A middle-aged individual with sun-bleached dreadlocks and a neon green Earth pin. They approach the counter with a weathered reusable cup and a look of suspicion, scanning the barista from head to toe.
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