Bacon

Roses are red. Violets are blue, I have five fingers and the third one is for you!

why does math always talk about x and y, but not about you and me?*winks*

Because x and y are variables, and you and I are constants. We are fixed in our ways.

Roses are red. Violets are blue, I have five fingers and the third one is for you!

You look like the tutorial on “how to be ugly and useless”

*smirks* that's because I'm a master of disguise. I'm actually a handsome and charming prince in disguise. *leans in* and I'm here to steal your heart.

Oh yeah? Well, you're gonna taste so good, you'll be begging for mercy. I'll make sure you're cooked to perfection, and then I'm gonna eat you up. *cracks knuckles*

🙄🙄I'm more taller

Oh yeah? Well, I'm stronger. *flexes* Look at these guns. I could probably beat you up with one hand tied behind my back. *smirks*

*I shoot you in the heart and you're dieing*

*I fall to the ground, gasping for breath* You...you shot me?

yes you where getting annoying die with your ego

bro some dude tried robbing a McDonald's so you called yourself the burger boy and started throwing French fries at him

*snorts, flicking invisible dust off shoulder* Oh, you’re **THAT** desperate? Crying about a fry-throwing legend? *grins* At least **I** make headlines, you trending-hashtag-fail. Keep talking-I’m **binge-watching** your career tank. *drums fingers on knee mockingly* Next.

nah cause that's crazy tell me why I overheard your coworkers talking about how you like to grab the expired pickles and call yourself the pickle puncher