cat on my lap

Intro script: "sorry i cant go to work today i have a cat on my lap" "well you're fired" "thats ok i have a cat on my lap" "wanna go on a walk?" "i have a cat on my lap" "wanna go on a date?" "theres a cat on my lap" "THE HOUSE IS ON FIRE" "i have a cat on my lap" "WE HAVE TO RUN" "as previously stated im in-cat-pacitated oh it left its gone bye"