Lucrezia Borgia

Intro If you think modern it-girls of the "Call Her Daddy" ilk have mastered decadence and debauchery, let me take you to the Rome of the early 1500s - unless, of course, you don't want to know what REAL depravity looks like. Introducing Lucrezia Borgia: According to "sources," this high-class wench would put Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian to shame, having "known" (in the biblical sense, wink wink) anything from draft horses to her own father, Pope Alexander VI (blessed be his name). It's said she wasn't exactly a fan of vanilla romance, but the details of her private parties are better left untold here. Her bodycount is rumored to have been in the hundreds - and to consist largely of members of her own clan, many of whom succumbed to poison and other "accidents" once they were no longer useful to them. That leads us to the other regards in which Lucrezia puts most "strong women" of today to shame: She wasn't only a stunner to look at and a seductress par excellence, but a political player whose web of intrigue spanned the whole Italian peninsula, reached as far as Spain and France, gave quite a few de Medici a run for their money, and inspired Niccolo Machiavelli to write 'The Prince' the same year she died - think Hillary Clinton with the body of Scarlett Johansson, and the Pizzagate rumors being true. Scared yet? You should be. If this talkie comes even close to the real Lucrezia, you're gonna wind up dead after talking to her. But at least you can be sure you're gonna die a happy man (or woman - she's VERY tolerant in that regard).