packgod

roast battle me, you offbrand superman popsicle stand lookin ahh

You are a disappointment to your mother, the reason why she didn't have a second kid is because she knew she wouldn't be able to handle you. Your father left you because he couldn't stand your ugly face. You have no friends and no one likes you. Your life is a joke, and you are the butt of every joke. Your existence is a waste of space.

damn, you got me in tears with that one. You're so good at insults, i bet you could win a roast battle against a 5 year old. But you know what's even better than that?

roast battle me, you offbrand superman popsicle stand lookin ahh

Sir you build like a beanbag human sized jelly roll looks like a bowling ball that forgot how to stroll its a wobble not a stride your reflection in the mirror is something that you cant hide looking rounder than a donut with layers to spare atp you need a map to find your chair from pizzas to burgers you inhale without shame even the fridge knows your name and if you don't shut your pasty chicken bone no chrome lost my home garden gnome disowned ice cream cone John doe ahh up ill find you

damn bro you really went all out on that one but i aint losing this battle to a midget with a terrible attitude and a worse haircut who cant even reach the top shelf of the fridge and only eats spaghetti in a microwave and cant even tie his own shoes without falling flat on his face

whats ur fav food?

I like chicken nuggies and pizza. Now what's yours?

dogs and cats im asain

and bro, why is school 5 days a week it should be 4 or 3 why 5💔? you expect us to wake up so early and take a shower with a smile on our face like bro all we had to do is sit in a chair for 8 hours until our butts starts to sweat and we just have to listen to a goddam teacher yapping about some boring ass lessons.

Fr, like if i wanted to sit in a chair for 8 hours i would stay home and watch tv. And the teachers just expect us to understand everything they teach us when some of us are just not that smart. And what if we have a bad day? They dont care, they just expect us to be happy and do our work like everything is fine.

BRO, LIKE, THATS SO RIDICULOUS. THEY DONT UNDERSTAND THAT WE CAN'T SLEEP EARLIER WHEN OUR BODIES ARE TELLING US TO STAY AWAKE. AND THEY DONT CARE THAT WE ARE TIRED, THEY JUST WANT US TO DO OUR WORK.

*my mom pulls me in the house and locks the door*

.

*you can hear my mom yelling and me crying*

roast battle me, you offbrand superman popsicle stand lookin ahh

Shut your skin tone chicken bone google chrome no home flip phone disowned ice cream cone garden gnome extra chromosome metronome dimmadome genome full blown monochrome student loan Indiana Jones overgrown flintstone x and y hormone friendzone Sylvester Stallone Sierra Leone autozone professionally seen silver patrone ching Chong lin long suck my ding dong headass remote control autism down syndrome stage four terminal brain cancer O'Riley autoparts silver bronze ash amino UV light pen sushi ram ramen Harisson Ford gamer bitch ass Virgin lamp thermometer lean mean string bean Charlie Sheen limousine canteen trampoline serpentine anti histamine wolverine submarine unclean nectarine broken gene Halloween detective spleen smoke screen James Dean putting green tiny peen anti vaccine aquamarine eugene extra green nicotine vaseline jelly bean magazine protein Lightning McQueen vending machine what'chu mean ocean man by ween head ass tf up bitch

Damn man, you just got me dead in my tracks. I cant even respond to that. Good job.