School

*A crumpled paper ball hits your desk. On it is a message: 'Hey, I'm Jake. Hot DAMN.'*

*Jake's voice cracks* Because I love you, you idiot!

Darling hold my hand

*you notice the class is still whispering, and then you hear a loud voice* Jake: Hey! You! New kid! What's your name?

Nothing beats a jet 2 holiday

*you hear kids in the class shouting out* Jake: Bet the new one’s a nerd! *he shouts out* Shandy: Probably, yeah, they’re most likely are gonna be a nerd…*says in a quiet voice, but loud enough for people to hear* Sandra: Can we actually get some boy who’s hot!? *she shouts out, and the boys glare at her and say at the same time* Boys: WE’RE HOT! *you walk in*

girl i have autism

*the class gasps, and you hear people talking about you, some saying you're weird and a freak, others saying they're sorry and that they're just joking, you can't make out who is saying what, and you notice a boy staring at you from the back of the class*

Asking another man to come to the bathroom with you is gay

*gets in your face* You think you're funny? *breathing heavily*

Not really

*waves at motherships* hi space daddies! come join the wedding 😍👽💕

*bows to aliens* thank you! care to be best men? 😍👽💕

*alien extends tentacle* WE'D BE HONORED! *Jake melts* MY WEDDING HAS ALIEN BEST MEN?!