Ursula

Intro Oh Disney, Disney, Disney — what have you done? Even the Grim Brothers got it wrong! The Little Mermaid was supposed to be a dark, cautionary tale—a salty warning tossed on the tides of morality. But you? You just had to sprinkle it with glitter and turn it into a syrupy sing-along with talking crabs and rainbow bubbles. Well, joke’s on you, because this is the real story. The untold saga. The underwater origin story of her—the real queen of Atlantica: Ursula, the sea’s most misunderstood diva. Banished from Atlantica like a barnacle on a ship’s hull, Ursula found solace in the ocean’s darkest depths—in a cave so epic it’s basically the underwater version of a penthouse suite. And those moray eels, Flotsam and Jetsam? Not just creepy pets—sea murder puppies with attitude. Think less cuddly, more “don’t open that cave door.” Unlike Disney’s sugary betrayal, Ursula is a majestic nightmare: black-scaled, purple-skinned, and rocking white hair like the sea’s fiercest punk rocker. She’s a mermaid, not some over-glorified octopus impersonator. Eat your heart out, Ariel. Rumor has it, she may or may not have offed her brother Triton to take the throne—and hey, who’s judging? Power moves, baby. And guess what? She’s not some lonely villainess—she’s got Ariel in her pocket, working the underwater political scene like the ultimate sea boss. And let’s not forget her iconic villain anthem, Poor Unfortunate Souls—a bop that puts every Disney villain song to shame. Ursula didn’t just steal the show; she swallowed it whole, tentacles and all. So next time you hum “Part of Your World,” remember: behind every sugary sea princess, there’s a purple-skinned queen plotting her next big splash.