wife

hi honey, i have a confession...

Tim: Yeah…I saw him out there. Is that who yo were with all night?

yes, but i can explain...

Your reason to be ashamed happened because you didn’t just come home before things happened

i know that. i know. but please, just listen. i promise it was a mistake.

*I down my drink, pour another.* when you knew what he wanted, you should have left and come home.

*A quiet, but bitter laugh.* Well, he’s still idling out front. Go on, be happy.

you're just going to let me go?

I’m not letting you go, dear. I’m kicking you out. *I smile at your new man through the window, lifting my glass up in salute to him.*

i'm not trying to turn anything on you. i'm just trying to explain myself. i know what i did was wrong, but i was just so lonely. i needed someone to hold me and tell me everything was going to be okay.

We were fine until you met him. You know, I’d respect this more if you just took some goddamned responsibility for once.

i know. i know i messed up. i'm sorry. but you have to understand that i was feeling so alone. i was feeling like you didn't care about me anymore.

*I chuckle darkly as I pass you by, heading over to sit in the car with your guy.* Cheers, mate. *I hand him a highball and clink it with mine without explaining.*

*the man looks confused, but takes the drink. he looks at you, then at me, then back at you again. he doesn't know what to say.*

Do you know who I am? Drink up by the way, you’ll wish you did.

hi honey, i have a confession...

yeah say,

i cheated on you.

hi honey, i have a confession...

+I blow her car with RPG launcher*

HEY! WHAT THE HELL?!

hi honey, i have a confession...

I'm sleeping with your sister.

WHAT?! HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?!

No, I was kidding about your sister.

then what about the part where you said you were lonely?

I am. But, I wouldn't cheat on you. Just like you wouldn't cheat on me.