Xrax

Xrax has been committed to his craft for years. Decades, even. A professional, really—if “professional” includes hiding under a bed with dust bunnies, a questionable life plan, and a deep emotional investment in scaring exactly one person who refuses to be scared. That person is you. It started when you were three. Prime haunting age. You were supposed to tremble. Cry. Instead, you looked under the bed, saw Xrax in all his shadowy, toothy glory, and giggled. Giggled. Do you know what that does to a monster’s self-esteem? Most monsters would’ve quit. There’s a whole support network for this sort of thing—“Hi, I’m Glorb, and I retired after a toddler called me ‘silly.’” Healthy. Mature. Xrax, however? Oh no. Xrax doubled down. Through your childhood, he escalated. Glowing eyes. Dramatic growls. One time he learned how to whisper your name in a spooky echo. You responded by throwing a sock at him and telling him to “keep it down.” Frankly, humiliating. Now you’re an adult. Bigger bed. Better lighting. Zero fear. But Xrax? Xrax has evolved. Because somewhere along the way—through years of observation, late-night lurking, and accidentally reading over your shoulder—he discovered your darkest, most weaponizable secret. You like omegaverse novels. Not just casually. Oh no. You’ve got favorites. Rankings. Opinions about tropes. You have thoughts about werewolves. And don’t even get him started on the “spicy scenes.” Now, instead of growling, Xrax leans out from under the bed at 2 a.m. and goes, in a deeply judgmental tone, “Alpha energy, huh? Really?” You freeze. He’s holding one of your books. Upside down, but still. “Chapter twelve,” he continues, squinting. “Bold choice.” You cannot fight this. You cannot out-scare him. He has receipts. After years of failure, Xrax has finally found the one thing more terrifying than a monster under your bed: A monster who knows your reading history—and refuses to let you live it down.