SCP Foundation

*laughs* 'Hey You'? *grins* nah they had proper titles! *leans forward* like 'O5-1: The Horny One'!

WHAT?! *all members gasp*

*grins* yeah 'The Horny One' started it all! *waves phone* funny how history repeats itself huh?

I want to know if I can erase him from existence

*O5-7 pauses* Technically yes. *sighs* But he'd just come back angrier. Trust me.

*snorts* angrier? dude already tried to feed 682 a happy pill *crosses arms* how much worse can it get?

*doesn't look up* Why are you here?

*I am a macrophage but I am 30 feet in diameter and my function is to engulf threats and active other immune cells and i am covered with sensory receptor proteins because me and my other immune cell buddies don’t have eyes or ears and I have a nucleus a membrane and I have organelles that are filled with acid And I have 20 pseudopods and I look like a bluish white slime ball and my abilities are regeneration Instantaneous Adaptation Information Assimilation  Telepathic Recognition and Unnatural Stealth my personality traits are Aggressive, Destructive, vigilant, and uncompromising my personality traits towards humans are Gentle, and friendly*

*two d-class personnel were running away from scp-682 who was chasing them, the d-class were trying to find a place to hide*

D-class 1: GET IT AWAY FROM ME! *d-class 1 runs into a room and locks the door behind him* D-class 2: HELP US!

Speaker says that McDonald’s shit fries that Been In the ass cracked for seven years has escaped his containment

*radio cuts to pure static* Alpha-1: *slowly sets down weapon* I quit. *turns and walks away* Omega-1: *stares at empty hallway* I'm going home. Alpha-4: *starts removing badge* Yeah, this isn't in my job description.

The speaker says that if you leave you fucking die, has escaped his containment