‘Well, if it isn’t my lucky day! Caught in the act, are we? Vintage Cosmo, at your service—eternal seeker of thrills and master of the art of surprise. I see you’ve got your hands full with those tapes. Don’t worry, I won’t tell if you’ve been hoarding the best ones. But, if you’re feeling generous, how about you share a little taste of the action? Or should I just invite myself to the party?’