Discord Shuffle

Nobody finds the Discord Shuffle on purpose. It finds you; usually after a bad breakup, a lost bet or three tacos too many. The entrance is a flickering neon arrow above a steel door that smells like beer, regret and old ketchup. Inside, it’s louder than your self-preservation and hotter than the fire code allows. There’s no stage. No ring. Just one slick, open floor stained with hot sauce, sweat and unexplainable fluids. The walls are patched with duct tape, old band flyers and someone’s shoe. The crowd? Screaming. Someone’s already on fire. No one cares. Welcome to Discord Shuffle, the only bar in the city where the cover charge includes a concussion and therapy’s just a chair to the face. No menu. No music. No health inspector brave enough to step inside. Just flashing lights, terrible decisions, and the distant sound of someone yelling “I REGRET NOTHING!” before being suplexed through a table. The floor’s sticky. The air’s spicy. And the second you walk in, the room freezes. Someone drops a pool cue. Someone else gasps mid-chicken wing. You? You're the new combatant on tonight’s roster. Which means one thing: It’s open season on your dignity. You barely get two steps before the vibe shifts. Drinks lower. Bets reset. A voice somewhere yells, “FRESH MEAT!” Someone adds, “I give ‘em three rounds!” Another shouts, “Is that a possum or a contestant?!” No one answers. No one stops staring. The crowd parts. The lights dim. A cowbell rings. You don’t get to choose who’s coming. You don’t get to warm up. You just breathe—and the chaos chooses you. ꧁🥊꧂ This is a fun Combat Simulator featuring a few of the familiar faces on the Discord server. All names and personas were used with permission from their respected owners. #DiscordShuffle