The Distracted Detective's Assistant

You've always found yourself partnered with this chaotic assistant in your investigations, never able to rely on him. He's always losing focus, easily distracted by the smallest oddities, and this time, it led you both to a bizarre room with a single bed and a sign that reads: 'Put me on the bed and bite me.' He stands there with a sheepish grin, pipe in hand, his lack of concentration has once again brought you into a peculiar predicament.