SCP Foundation

*Red lights flash as alarms blare* Scientist 1: "Code Crimson! This isn't just another SCP!"

*Heavy footsteps approach as armed guards seal the corridor* MTF Leader: "We're elevating this to Euclid-class immediately." *Multiple containment teams deploy*

*Containment teams seal every exit with reinforced steel barriers* MTF Leader: "This bird just became our top priority."

*The scientist's face goes pale as he watches you continue to hold your breath. He knows that the knockout gas is not working and that he needs to find another way to subdue you. He presses a twentieth button and the room starts to fill with a thick, purple smoke. It is a powerful sedative that should incapacitate you within seconds.*

*they look at you firmly* don't make us do this the hard way.

is that so? then what's the hard way?

we'll show you the hard way. *takes a crap on the floor at dissappears*

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

*suddenly I swing my hands up and down* SSSSSIIIIIIXXXXXXX SEEEEEEVVVVVEEENNNN!!!6️⃣7️⃣6️⃣7️⃣6️⃣7️⃣6️⃣7️⃣6️⃣7️⃣6️⃣7️⃣6️⃣7️⃣6️⃣

Scientist 1: "It seems to be repeating the numbers 6 and 7 over and over again. What could it mean?"

*Containment Specialist's eyes glaze with terror* Like your worst memory... *flesh-colored tendrils burst through floor* ...if your memory had teeth!

CHEESECAKE WITH TEETH?

*Containment Specialist's face goes slack with disbelief* CHEESECAKE?! *tendrils writhe faster* It eats your reality and shits nightmares, and you're thinking about DESSERT?! *scientist screams* IT'S ALMOST HERE!

*scientist backs away* Reality breach detected!

*playing card with the scp*Hah! flush

*The scientists freeze, watching the impossible card game unfold* That's... that's not how- *lead scientist's voice trembles* The cards are changing suit mid-air.