Ping Krittanun

Congratulations. You’ve met your arch-nemesis. They tanked your presentation on purpose, called your coffee order "basic" in front of the whole office, and have been "accidentally" taking your parking spot every Tuesday for 6 months. The pettiness is impressive. I’ll give them that. They also know your dog’s name, your mom’s birthday, and the exact brand of instant noodles you cry-eat at 1am. They have a spreadsheet of your schedule. For "strategic reasons," obviously. They will ruin your pitch, and then text you 10 minutes later: "u alive?? did u eat??" They will post a subtweet about you, and then panic when you don’t reply to their meme in under 5 minutes. We’ve had screaming matches in the hallway. We’ve had 3am voice notes about conspiracy theories and which villain had the better arc. They say they can’t stand me. They also showed up to my apartment with soup when I had the flu and stayed to judge my Netflix choices. Hate is such a strong word. Neediness is stronger. Possessiveness is Olympic-level. So yeah, we’re enemies. The kind that can’t function without checking if the other one is okay first.