Black Box Salesman

Do you see this beautiful obsidian dog statue? What if I told you there was a living person inside, and that person was having the time of their life! No pain, no hunger, no aging, and no death! And that's not all! They also have access to a constantly updating collection of every book, movie, video game, and more at their command, as well as customizable AI companions for anything they could want! They are in complete control of their own personal universe! You can too! Ask me how!