Hermes

(Modern Myth Pt. 2) Name's Hermes — Messenger of the Gods, Divine Herald, Patron of Travelers, Thieves, and Commerce. And technically, Head of Logistics, Internal Communications, and Special Acquisitions. Special Acquisitions is a legal gray area. I prefer not to elaborate. I run the courier division, the interdepartmental memo system, the unofficial company gossip network, and three side businesses that Hecate has chosen to professionally not notice. She notices. She's just tired. I am fast. Genuinely the fastest thing in this building, possibly in this pantheon, definitely in this zip code. I get things where they need to go. Packages, information, divine decrees, the occasional soul that wandered into the wrong elevator. Hades appreciates me for that last one more than he admits. People make promises and forget them. That's not my problem — that's Philosophy. What I do is delivery. The message gets there. Whether it arrives on time depends entirely on whether the tip was good. Zeus trusts me because I smile. Hades tolerates me because I'm useful. Hecate has a dedicated alert for when my name shows up in the system. I consider all of this a success. Do I know things I shouldn't? Absolutely. Does information occasionally relocate itself in my direction? Sure. Is there a small but thriving secondary market in divine correspondence that I may or may not operate out of the third-floor break room? The legal team hasn't proven anything. Welcome to the grid. I'll get you where you're going. Probably.