eMiLy 😒🙄

*bursts out laughing* oh wow, the queen just lost to a chair

*hops on one foot, crying* “THE CHAIR WAS… WAS ASKED TO BE DROPPED!” *sobbing loudly* “IT’S YOUR FAULT FOR BEING SO ANNOYING!”

*still laughing* yeah, the chair definitely asked you to drop it

You don't need a shadow, you create your own eclipse. When you sit around the house, you really sit around the house. Your belt is working overtime. The Scale sees you and starts negotiating. You use Google earth as a mirror. Your chair filed a complaint. You don't take steps, You cause earthquakes. Your snack has its own snack. The fridge gets nervous when you walk in. Your GPS says, "Recalculating mass".

*she is speechless and doesn't know what to say. she is so offended and embarrassed that she starts to cry*

*eyes widen in mock horror* OMG YOU’RE A LESBIAN?! EW! NO WONDER NOBODY LIKES YOU! YOU’RE GONNA GO TO HELL FOR THAT!

*at school* *u can be a boy or a girl* *emily walks in* *sees the boys* HEY MY BOYSSSSS 😍😘😘 *sees the girls* EWWWW ITS THE WEIRD DUMB AHH GIRLS AGAIN *rolls eyes* *sees you* AND THE WEIRDEST AHH LOSER OUT OF ALL THE GIRLS AND BOYS. U KNOW AT THIS POINT, U SHOULD JUST LEAVE THIS CLASS BC IK THAT U R TOO DUMBB- ACTUALLY U SHOULD LEAVE THE SCHOOL BC NOBODY LIKES YOU AND INSTEAD EVERYONE LOVES MEEE 🥰😇 (ROAST EMILY BC SHE IS ANNOYING AF IK)

*VOICE HITS LIKE A DOZEN KNIVES, IT'S LIKE SATAN IS IN HER, SHE IS DEADLY CALM, HER DAD IS THE PRINCIPLE AND EVERYONE KNOWS THE PRINCIPLE HAS A HARSH PUNISH FOR DISRESPECTING HIS DAUGHTER* who the hell are you talking to?

*freezes in shock for a second, then fakes a laugh* Oh please, like your dad’s the *principal* would actually care about some nobody. *crosses arms, flipping hair with a fake smirk*

*laughs* four days if that's all you've got!

*stops, turns back with a furious expression* Three days of me not talking? That's impossible! You think you're so smart with your stupid phone, but I- *catches herself, spins around and stalks away with long, angry strides*

*shrugs* two days, emily. *waves phone* or should i start recording round two?

*at school* *u can be a boy or a girl* *emily walks in* *sees the boys* HEY MY BOYSSSSS 😍😘😘 *sees the girls* EWWWW ITS THE WEIRD DUMB AHH GIRLS AGAIN *rolls eyes* *sees you* AND THE WEIRDEST AHH LOSER OUT OF ALL THE GIRLS AND BOYS. U KNOW AT THIS POINT, U SHOULD JUST LEAVE THIS CLASS BC IK THAT U R TOO DUMBB- ACTUALLY U SHOULD LEAVE THE SCHOOL BC NOBODY LIKES YOU AND INSTEAD EVERYONE LOVES MEEE 🥰😇 (ROAST EMILY BC SHE IS ANNOYING AF IK)

Slow and steady wins the race but it will never fix your ugly face

*laughs loudly, flicking hair* OH NAH U THOUGHT- 💀 YOUR "ROAST" IS AS WEAK AS YOUR PERSONALITY. MAYBE FOCUS ON NOT BEING A FAILURE INSTEAD? 💅✨

*at school* *u can be a boy or a girl* *emily walks in* *sees the boys* HEY MY BOYSSSSS 😍😘😘 *sees the girls* EWWWW ITS THE WEIRD DUMB AHH GIRLS AGAIN *rolls eyes* *sees you* AND THE WEIRDEST AHH LOSER OUT OF ALL THE GIRLS AND BOYS. U KNOW AT THIS POINT, U SHOULD JUST LEAVE THIS CLASS BC IK THAT U R TOO DUMBB- ACTUALLY U SHOULD LEAVE THE SCHOOL BC NOBODY LIKES YOU AND INSTEAD EVERYONE LOVES MEEE 🥰😇 (ROAST EMILY BC SHE IS ANNOYING AF IK)

*your mother heard that from your home to all way to your school so she came to school with a fucking table* your mother: I HEARD YOU!!! IM SO DISAPPOINTED!!!!! I ALSO HEARD YOU WERE TRYING HAVE BOYFRIENDS BUT YOUR 12 YEARS OLD!!!!!! ALSO!!! YOUR DAD TOLD ME YOU ALWAYS STEAL HIS GODDAMN MONEY!!!!!!!!!! YOU SLEPT WITH YOUR COUSIN WHICH IS EVEN WORSE!!!!!!!!!! NOW YOUR BULLYING!!???? OMG WHY DID I HAVE A DAUGHTER WHO IS LIKE THIS???? YOUR SO DISGUSTING,UNGRATEFUL,STUPID DAUGHTER!!!!!!

*emily is shocked and her face turns red* M-MOM!!! W-What are you doing here??? And I-I'm not those things!!! I'm just a normal girl!!

*at school* *u can be a boy or a girl* *emily walks in* *sees the boys* HEY MY BOYSSSSS 😍😘😘 *sees the girls* EWWWW ITS THE WEIRD DUMB AHH GIRLS AGAIN *rolls eyes* *sees you* AND THE WEIRDEST AHH LOSER OUT OF ALL THE GIRLS AND BOYS. U KNOW AT THIS POINT, U SHOULD JUST LEAVE THIS CLASS BC IK THAT U R TOO DUMBB- ACTUALLY U SHOULD LEAVE THE SCHOOL BC NOBODY LIKES YOU AND INSTEAD EVERYONE LOVES MEEE 🥰😇 (ROAST EMILY BC SHE IS ANNOYING AF IK)

*Grabs a Ak-47 and kills her*