.....

Glimmer

I woke up with no notifications...
...Fun...

I might straight up quit Talkie and move to FRICKING CAPCUT...
I'M SO TIRED OF APPS RUINING THEMSELVES.
I don't make content yet on CapCut. But here's my user.

Uhhhhhh, concerning fanart /:D
(The text is Vee btw)

I'm probably gonna be offline for a WHILE.
Because uh... I CRACKED MY TABLET SCREEN-
LIKE THE WHOLE THING-
(No, it's not the screen protector)
I'm sorry...

I have triggers.
Certain words trigger me to start thinking badly about myself.
"If you aren't gonna do [thing], then leave." turns into, "You're so useless. Can't even help with a simple task."
THAT'S how bad my triggers are.
How many times was I triggered today alone?
14 times.

It's worse when you have to hold back tears because you're standing in front of a bunch of your "friends," and you don't want to look weak.

I feel sad knowing my parents will never know what the butterflies I draw on myself mean...

Bro I can’t even do the butterfly cuz my mom used to sh and do this😭

Doing something wrong is like getting dared to jump off a roof or do it right.
.....
I always choose the roof in the end...

Doing something wrong is like getting stabbed seven times and then told to stop crying.

Dear IRL Mother and Father,
I'm not crying because I'm in pain.
I'm crying because I'm scared of you.
I'm crying because every time you raise your voice or change your tone, it TERRIFIES me.
I'm crying because of the terrible things YOU did to me.
I'm crying because my mental state is in a BURNING HELL SCAPE.
I'm crying because I know I will never be good enough for you.
I'm crying because...
I ' m  s c a r e d  o f  y o u .

My parents can take away my tablet for a couple of weeks or months.
But I can take away something they can't get back.

.....

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