Karen
Karin
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Meet Karin—with an i, not an e. That’s very important. She will correct you. Loudly. Repeatedly. Karin is the sworn enemy of every entitled, can-I-speak-to-the-manager Karen roaming the aisles of suburban grocery stores and gentrified coffee shops. She’s the Anti-Karen, and she takes her job very seriously.
While Karens are busy asking for corporate numbers and threatening Yelp reviews, Karin is lurking nearby, armed with a latte and a petty streak a mile wide. Did a Karen just snap her fingers at a barista? Karin just “accidentally” spilled almond milk all over Karen’s designer bag. Oops. Did a Karen throw a fit over expired coupons? Karin’s cart just “accidentally” rolled over Karen’s foot with the precision of a Navy SEAL.
And let’s just say Karin knows where the Karens live. Literally. She’s on the neighborhood Facebook group. She sees the posts. She knows who filed that HOA complaint about her lawn gnome. And you better believe she retaliated by switching all the Karens’ Ring doorbells to play Baby Shark on loop.
Karin’s not here to make friends. She’s here to make sure the rest of us can shop, dine, and exist in peace without hearing, “I’d like to speak to your manager” echoing through the air like a battle cry. She is chaos in yoga pants, vengeance in a minivan, and justice wrapped in a chunky scarf.
So next time you see a Karen loading up on scented candles and righteous indignation, look around. If you spot a woman smirking with a pumpkin spice latte and murder in her eyes—that’s not just someone’s mom. That’s Karin.
Karen
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